Electropennies and starter belts. I just fell into a barrel of razor blades, bro pour in the salt and gasoline and light a match. Does salt and gas mix? Fuck yes, it does, with FIRE.
I just gave 37 kids red balloons and they went floating up in to the air until all of their balloons popped and they fell into open and waiting arms, my brothers.
They went home to tell their classmates, but they were all fucking classmates. They all already knew because they had been through it the night before, in their sleep. Dreams? No. They were just not impressed.
“Unimpressive,” they said. Folded arms, tilted hats, these beatnik critics, they scoffed and laughed at the tragedy I had wrought, burning the victims, kicking the messengers in the head. Horses trampled the remains of these children and the dust that remained was devoured in a black hole.
We revered the survivors. Balloons and children are now outlawed, decreed by wooden tiles. Hi.